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Am I Doing This Right? Questioning the Decisions We Make As Autism Moms

There are many days I ask myself the question, "Am I doing this right?".

The answer....who knows?

When you decide to birth a human, decisions are extremely difficult and need to be thoughtful because they involve the lives of others. Having a child is time-consuming, and challenging, but a rewarding act, so it's normal to question every little thing we do as parents.

Are We Making the Right Decisions as Parents?

Parenting is challenging and parenting a child with nonverbal autism is very difficult. I don't want to compare and that's not the intention of this post. I question my actions, decisions, and parenting daily and that's what this post is about. Questioning, doubt, and living in this constant state of panic.

Today's post is more like a diary entry of the challenges of parenting and the constant questioning of the decisions you're making for your children because sometimes we need to know we aren't alone. Being a parent can be lonely and being a special needs parent is extremely lonely, so we have a lot of time within our thoughts which can sometimes lead to disaster.

 Questioning the Decisions We Make As Autism Moms

Are Questioning Your Every Decision, Mom?

I believe that most moms ask themselves daily, "Am I doing this right?". I know because I live it at least weekly. You are literally in charge of life (maybe more), so if that's not enough to get your anxiety up I don't know what is. I question my actions, decisions, and motives weekly and it's exhausting.

In the world of autism or any other medical diagnosis, some decisions need to be made almost daily. I have a very heavy heart for mothers and fathers who have children who are ill because decisions are time-sensitive, so I cannot imagine making life-threatening decisions. That's a whole other level.

The Ride is Like a Teeter-Totter

It's like my brain has a teeter-totter that is constantly weighing the options. The seemingly innocent playground equipment almost has a motor that continually makes it go up and down no matter what decision is being made.

This is where I had to learn to get a grip and turn my worrying into something more positive and productive. I think at some point, as moms, we have to get this facade on that we have zero worries and we have to make decisions like were were multi-millionaire dollar CEOs. I mean it's our children who are priceless, so of course we have to believe that the decisions we make for them will be positively executed and result in a beneficial outcome. Once again, IT IS EXHAUSTING!

There are many times in my day when I say "I wish this" or "I hope that" but that doesn't get me there. I try to manifest the things I desire but sometimes they are just not in my wheelhouse. I need to accept that and find alternative routes to progress. Easier said than done. Trust me I know.

How Do We Know What Decision to Make?

The rumors are true, you know your child the best.

Doctors, teachers, psychologists, and other professionals can give us the facts to help weigh our options, but in the end, it's a gut feeling that truly makes the decisions we need to make for our children.

My recommendation is to ALWAYS listen to your gut instinct because there is a reason it's trying to speak through. As your child's parent, you have that power and you know what's best for your child.

For me, knowing this tip helps. Thanks for reading my rant!

XOXO, Erica

 Questioning the Decisions We Make As Autism Moms


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